• Advance Praise


    "A darkly entertaining first novel ..."

    --Tom Perrotta (Election, Little Children)


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Welcome to the Fanboy and Goth Girl web site! Browse the site for information about the book, an excerpt, VidLit link, images, and more.

You'll also get a chance to meet the main characters from the book through their blogs and letters.






Letter: Dear Neil

(Written by Kyra Sellers) [NOTE from the writer: Some asshole hacked into my computer at home and stole a bunch of private letters that I was never going to send anyway. He’s posting them on the web and I can’t stop him.]

Dear Neil,

So, today I found out that you’re married. I was reading an interview with you and you mentioned something about your wife and it really sort of pissed me off.

Don’t get the wrong idea. This isn’t me being some null-brained, romance-addled idiot chick. I’m not in LOVE with you, dumb-ass. I’m not that stupid.

But here’s the thing, Neil: Marriage is bullshit. OK? Marriage is just a way that people tie each other up and keep each other down. You don’t get anything out of marriage. I know. I had a front row seat to my parents’ marriage for twelve years and I can tell you that it’s meaningless and petty and stupid. It’s arguing and long, cold silences and a never-ending string of half-finished discussions and pointless debates. If you’re lucky, it settles into a sort of tundra, with a frigid skin that won’t crack no matter what.

It’s a leftover. A hold-out from a time when people died young (which is better than it sounds, but that’s a subject for another letter) and when “forever” meant until the pox or a wild boar or something killed you.

Go back through the stuff you’ve written and there’s not a lot of it that sings the praises of marriage. I know — I’ve been re-reading a lot of your stuff lately. And I’m still impressed by the way you bring characters to life, especially the ones on the fringe, the ones who NEED to be brought to life because most people can’t be bothered to pay attention to them. You’ve got this empathy for the people who can’t be bothered with smiling while society kicks them in the teeth.

And then you betray them by doing the most boring, predictable, middle-class, APPROVED thing in the world: getting married.

I don’t know how long you’ve been married, but it’s a mistake. And you know it’s a mistake. You’ve known for a long time, haven’t you?

Kyra

6 Responses to “Letter: Dear Neil”

  1. William says:

    I don’t believe marriage is a bad thing, I DO believe rushing into marriage is a bad thing though and there are a LOT of people doing that these days. Don’t fret over marriage, fret over the divorce, eh?

  2. alki says:

    Kyra,

    You know what marriage is from the spectator point of view, but you have never experienced it. Watching two people kissing will not give you a hint of how a kiss can shake you inside out.
    As much as you miss your mother, it’s not her marriage that killed her.
    Retreating from the world, hating every soul, will not bring her back.
    Think about what would make her happy. She would like you to be happy, living your life in color, not in a blacked out solitude.
    Look around you, open your mind. There is somebody who is looking for you, somebody who doesn’t care about the size of your boobs, but who cares about your soul.
    Love is the only reason to live. And if loves ends up in marriage, then marriage is the best thing this world can bring us.

    Alki.

  3. Ryan says:

    So true……….it’s sad…………..just like a cold blade tapping into a pestilence filled mind

  4. Thoth says:

    well marrige is can of boring when ur in it and i like funerals better cause i see peopl cry and i try not to smell but i help but like i umm i have goth friend and in the book goths dont cut them self i thought there suppose to be emo bot watever

  5. Thoth says:

    well marrige is can of boring when ur in it and i like funerals better cause i see peopl cry and i try not to smell but i help but like i umm i have goth friend and in the book goths dont cut them self i thought there suppose to be emo but watever

  6. Phate says:

    While the arguments within are persuasive and (much more importantly) evocative, I will not make the mistake of my cretinesque and self-deceiving forebears within this facsimile of a blog post. I will instead preclude my critique with the distinction that I am writing not to a mediocre fictional character, but to her patriarch, whom I believe has the potential to be a great authour.

    The discourse has no immediate errors save the emptiness… try for more compelling next time. You certainly have no problem imbuing Fanboy with a distinct charm that one would notice to the exclusion of his circumstances; why not do the same with Kyra, rather than make her only endearing moments be either a response to external stimuli or a tragic, stereotypically “goth” moment? Surely, if there’s anywhere you can portray a unique side of Kyra, it’s here, in her own private documents?

    And yet her jaded idealism shines brightly (darkly?) forth in the last half of her letter. The phrase “can’t be bothered to smile while society kicks them in the teeth” epitomises Kyra. Honestly, I can’t decide whether you’re a good authour or not – for every two or three cliched sentences (“Don’t get the wrong idea, I’m just another punk teenage goth girl in denial… the boring, predictable, middle-class, APPROVED thing to do”) , you let loose with an epigramatic, delightfully descriptive (admittedly rough, but then the same is said of the proverbial early diamond) afterthought such as “If you’re lucky, it settles into a sort of tundra, with a frigid skin that won’t crack no matter what.”

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